Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me

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(313): I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me http://tfl.nu/x1tc

Replies (8) Good night (1655) Bad night (1687)
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(561): View more from Florida

Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!

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(561): Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir! http://tfl.nu/b2ab

Replies (18) Good night (2873) Bad night (723)
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(954): View more from Florida

You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter

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(954): You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter http://tfl.nu/xmwz

Replies (17) Good night (2245) Bad night (613)
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(210): View more from Texas

life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.

(210): View more from Texas

i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.

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(210): life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass" (570): hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge. (210): i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you. http://tfl.nu/8941

Replies (23) Good night (5952) Bad night (2045)
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(740): View more from Ohio

Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?

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(740): Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case? http://tfl.nu/5skf

Replies (17) Good night (5087) Bad night (804)
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(716): View more from New York

For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.

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(716): For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st. http://tfl.nu/kimy

Replies (6) Good night (2096) Bad night (760)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.

(1-828): View more from North Carolina

..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.

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(828): remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch. (1-828): ..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so. http://tfl.nu/n0v1

Replies (8) Good night (1993) Bad night (668)
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(989): View more from Michigan

These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.

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(989): These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila. http://tfl.nu/gkow

Replies (6) Good night (931) Bad night (535)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I immediately regret the tequila decision.

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(248): I immediately regret the tequila decision. http://tfl.nu/ptpj

Replies (4) Good night (661) Bad night (428)
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(917): View more from New York City

MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??

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(917): MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL?? http://tfl.nu/mxcy

Replies (3) Good night (532) Bad night (428)
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(716): View more from New York

tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"

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(716): tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered" http://tfl.nu/w7hl

Replies (0) Good night (594) Bad night (348)
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(217): View more from Illinois

You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling

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(217): You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling http://tfl.nu/odh7

Replies (1) Good night (647) Bad night (328)
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(207): View more from Maine

What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand

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(207): What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand http://tfl.nu/crhx

Replies (3) Good night (364) Bad night (432)
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(319): View more from Iowa

I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.

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(319): I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me. http://tfl.nu/n3l6

Replies (1) Good night (416) Bad night (713)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?

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(859): Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"? http://tfl.nu/ijad

Replies (8) Good night (475) Bad night (143)

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