I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
