Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
40s are totally the cure
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
