Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
