It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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