I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
