he told me I talked like a deaf person
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
