Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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