You made me cry and you don't even care
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
