she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
