Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
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after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
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I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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