Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
