I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
