I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
