oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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