This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
