My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
