If i come over, it means nothing
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
