I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
