Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Randomize
