She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
