i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
