Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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