# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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