Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
