rhymes with "ouble enetration"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize
