You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
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with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
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I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Dick very happy bro
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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