so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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