I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
