I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
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