her vagine was all disorganized.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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