Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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