So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
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She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
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YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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