she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I deserve this hangover.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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