What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
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