You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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