I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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