Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'

  (312): View more from Illinois

  i was like PREG?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?' (312): i was like PREG? http://tfl.nu/r2o4
  Replies (9) Good night (898) Bad night (1109)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/igis
  Replies (6) Good night (1354) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called. http://tfl.nu/lgas
  Replies (21) Good night (3216) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then. http://tfl.nu/hp3p
  Replies (17) Good night (2867) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up? http://tfl.nu/8v8k
  Replies (20) Good night (856) Bad night (6111)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  he asked me to smell his eyeballs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): he asked me to smell his eyeballs. http://tfl.nu/b2rr
  Replies (20) Good night (962) Bad night (5041)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application. http://tfl.nu/ha6k
  Replies (7) Good night (3618) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday? http://tfl.nu/ynw6
  Replies (16) Good night (4504) Bad night (1388)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet http://tfl.nu/o0c7
  Replies (11) Good night (5793) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier. http://tfl.nu/l0xp
  Replies (3) Good night (1019) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina. http://tfl.nu/56nz
  Replies (12) Good night (386) Bad night (1705)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland." http://tfl.nu/m13s
  Replies (7) Good night (1511) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night. http://tfl.nu/smsc
  Replies (5) Good night (312) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn http://tfl.nu/7pye
  Replies (5) Good night (531) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits." http://tfl.nu/82c3
  Replies (6) Good night (686) Bad night (179)

Randomize