This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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