Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm at about main and main street
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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