Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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