If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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