Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
