I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
