my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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