but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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