I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
All the doctor said was why
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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