Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
