Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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