Those balls look pretty dangerous.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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