I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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