drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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